IT'S OKAY TO TAKE A STEP BACKWARDS

My body says put down the coffee... the creamer isn’t helping my gut anyway...

So I pick up the water.
It helps that I’ve been too lazy to make tea..

But this morning, after a lot of dairy products yesterday, I felt so sick.

And heavy.

My bra didn’t fit right... I have plenty to choose from, but when I am in my best shape, this one fits perfect... today it was just a little too snug.

I knew those size small t shirts I bought recently we’re not an option for my bloated belly today.

I grabbed a sweater. Knew I didn’t want to wear jeans. Leggings would only show off how bloated I feel.

I may feel bloated and like I gained back all of the weight I lost, but I still had a wardrobe win today.

The gray slacks.

The ones with little polka dots on them. I have a matching blazer.

My mom bought this suit for me almost 10 years ago.

The pants were tight when I opened them up on Christmas morning. But not so tight that I couldn’t wear them.

At least on my good days.

The days when I wasn’t bloated.

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Kind of Jeff

Losing a loved one is never easy, and it's something you never really get over. We move forward and on with our lives, but there is always a hole left in our souls by losing someone we are close to. When my mom mentioned I needed to get my cards in the mail earlier this month (I inherited my inability to make it to the post office from her), I started thinking about how I really wanted to commemorate my dad. 
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I am FINALLY telling my story...

Fear that made me stay silent, fear that made me do what he wanted, fear of what happened if I didn’t. Fear of speaking out, even now as an adult. Fear of what others would think if I did. Fear of how my family would react to me sharing my story. Fear has been my worst enemy.
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